I’m thankful I took so well to academia after returning. My greatest fear was being stuck at the same place where I grew up, and COVID made it come true. Everything was closed, there was nowhere to go. Even once things reopened, the threat of infection cooled any thoughts of outings. As someone who had […]

I’m 29 at the time of writing this, so this was about three years ago. I’d really like to not have to revisit the COVID days, but it did happen. I don’t want to revisit them because I don’t want to acknowledge how much changed. Change is rarely instant, and you don’t notice it as […]

I’m angry that I forgot when my last grandfather died. He meant so much to me, the man who was one of the best role models for me as a young boy. But, I have to remind myself that it’s more important to not forget the person—and I’ll never forget him. He had been getting […]

Outside of classes, things got a little better. I still came home to the place I’ve grown to hate every day, but at least it was comfortable and safe. I’ve never been homeless, I’ve never been in the type of dire straits some of the worst off in society have been at. I like to […]

I only took two classes in the spring. Since I was footing the bill for university, I figured I could approach it how I wanted—and I wanted an easy return. My old major, my old requirements, so I picked an elective. One of the classes was a Moving Image Arts course, one of the introductory […]

While I was far away trying to get my life back on track, the family I had back home was dealing with problems of their own. Chief among them was my maternal grandfather’s deteriorating health. He had a stroke several years prior, and was already far from the picture of good health. He smoked for […]

My father and his fiance did their best to help me. They told me about programs I could apply to, and encouraged me to keep applying for jobs. I got a position at a deli for a local supermarket, and quit after one four-hour shift. I really was pathetic. Tension between myself and my father […]

From one end of the United States to the other. It’s one thing to take a trip and know you’re going home later; it’s another thing to make that trip knowing you’re not going back. Home wasn’t where I left; it wasn’t where I was going either. In a sense, I was going to find […]

Of all the years of my 20s, this one I remember the least. There were no mind-altering substances I consumed, or any sort of binging save for what I stuffed my face with. I simply did so little of worth, and had such a crushing sense of helplessness that on a psychological level, I must […]

Really, this year only needed two parts, but I wanted to go in some depth about how fucking stupid I was to fall into the Trumposphere so completely. For me, it doesn’t matter that I snapped out of it relatively quickly—by mid-2017 in fact. Nor does it matter that I’ve worked to inform anyone who’s […]